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Difficult Conversations are Worth It


Difficult Conversations are Worth It
  • AuthorPaula West
  • DateApril 13, 2023
  • MediumNewsletter Article
If you are receiving the review, it will help to remember that workplaces genuinely want their employees to succeed, and these conversations are to help you improve and grow in your role.

It is normal to be uncomfortable with difficult conversations. Our hearts race, our mouths get dry and often our hands get sweaty. This is commonly known as the flight or fight response. When in a stressful situation, our nervous system triggers these physical responses. They are completely normal and can happen to all of us. How you react is in your control.

 

 

We are uncomfortable talking about a conflict at work, or when we want to ask for a pay increase. These conversations are normal and essential to work through. Every stage in life includes difficult conversations. We have them when we are kids, teenagers, adults, parents, employees and as employers. It is time to get comfortable with the uncomfortable.

 

 

Sometimes, an unplanned or planned difficult conversation can put you in this state. Here are four tips to help you calm the nervous system and maintain control of your emotions during the conversation.

 

  1. Sit down at eye level with the person with whom you are talking.
  2. Plant both feet on the ground.
  3. Take a deep breath, or two.
  4. Start the conversation.

 

Sometimes the conversation could be about a disappointing performance review. If you are receiving the review, it will help to remember that workplaces genuinely want their employees to succeed, and these conversations are to help you improve and grow in your role. If you were to never receive constructive feedback, then you can risk becoming lateral and could end up feeling stuck in your role. Which can also lead to another uncomfortable conversation.

 

 

Communication tips to have an effective difficult conversation:

 

  • Use clear language. Direct language is kind, and useful, and makes the experience valuable. Use specific examples and facts.
  • Listen. It is an important part of understanding all perspectives and for personal growth to be an outcome of this difficult conversation.
  • Agree to take a break. Taking a break can end up being more productive and have better results than pushing through. A break could mean an hour or revisiting the conversation the next day.

 

Once the conversation has started, you should feel better and will begin to feel comfortable. The hardest part is over. You have spoken aloud to your manager/supervisor about what is on your mind and a path to resolution or understanding can be started. Remember the four tips to help you calm your insides and the communication tips provided to help be an effective communicator. We all have been a part of hard conversations and it is natural for people to continue to have them. It is how we grow as individuals and as teams. So, go ahead, prep yourself and schedule that conversation.

 

If you are looking for more resources to help you with your career growth, please check out our Career Success Library. It is full of great resources for you to explore.

 

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